Thornock.Org

Spoil my appetite?

by Jake on Aug.27, 2008, under Uncategorized

The other day, I was walking home and passed a large social function at the Business School. They always have some hooplah or another and it is my duty to try to score some free food from these events. So I wandered in and found several giant plates of free cookies. I quickly grabbed four cookies, wrapped them in a napkin and continued my walk home. (I accidentally grabbed a raisin cookie–sick, that recipe should be burned as heresy. Raisins are meant for babies and constipation, not cookies. The other three cookies, all chocolate chip, were delish.)

Anyways, as I was walking home, I thought, will this cookie spoil my appetite? You’ve heard the old adage “…it’ll spoil your appetite,” right?

IF ONLY IT WOULD!

If I could invent a cookie that would spoil appetites, I could put Jenny Craig out of business. Think about it–a cookie that removes your hunger: “…who cares about dinner when I just ate that filling cookie?” All of my late-night run-ins with cream cheese dip and peanut butter ice cream would be satiated by a mere cookie.

Turns out that this old adage is a lie and I’ve decided to expunge it from my vocabulary. I’m not at all worried that some delicacy will spoil my appetite. In fact, I would pay a pretty penny for a cookie that would.

12 comments for this entry:
  1. Maran

    This is a pretty hilarious post! I totally agree, although there have been times when I ate too many cookies before dinner and wasn’t hungry anymore. I probably ate more calories than I would have with just dinner.

  2. grandpa idaho

    oh man im feelin for you. the jodikaye took old pa down to the salty lake to see if jill hooper was preggers yet and to silently observe her spend $1300 at the coach outlet at park city. yup!then jill and hubby took us to an unpronounceable mexican place down the street from their townhouse that had every kind of delicious meat and spice, such as beef,tongue,sweet sweet pork(which i had) and brains! yuuuuuum. so i ate too much AS USUAL! then last night i had heapin helpins of hawaiian haystacks til i almost busted open at the seams. BOOM SPLORP! oh yeah back to cookies- the only way to slow me down is put sawdust and ground glass and raisens in. that`ll fix things.
    jeez will you give this up already, you will give me and all your siblings inferiority feelings, and thats my job!
    mind your pa!

  3. Hollie

    I think that saying refers to young children. I have a hard time getting my kids to eat dinner if they’ve filled up on snacks and treats. As adults, we’ve learned to ignore those “I’m not hungry” signals because food tastes sooo good. Ah, to be a kid again and not have a worry in the world!

  4. Jake

    Mike, thanks for the link. I bought six dozen of those cookies… -Jake

  5. Mike

    That’s gonna be one helluva meal. :)

  6. Terressa

    i love reading your posts…you are always thinking on a level that i will probably never get to in this life…i’m sorry, but i don’t think i would have ever thought to prove the adage wrong let alone dwell on how to do it…you got brains brother! :)

  7. Mom

    I thought I was reading Kerrie’s post and pictured her with the stroller taking the cookies until I got to the word “expunged”! Then the whole picture changed. I have to say that many times while baking Monster Cookies, it became my dinner! Six cookies will definitely ruin your appetitie :) . Great to hear from you Jake. You can make me laugh! Love ya! Momma Donna

  8. Jennifer

    Yah- still waiting for something to spoil my appetite (besides the stomach flu). Or be “too rich” for that matter. MMMM- raisin cookies :)

  9. Big Jake

    Just curious about those Hollywood Miracle Cookies. Sorry Guys, no sawdust or grass clippings. It’s a protein bar pressed into a cookie shape. Corporate advertising tempting our palates. Its an interesting list of ingredients;
    Enriched Wheat Flour , Niacin , Reduced Iron , Thiamine Mononitrate , Riboflavin , Folic Acid , Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips , Sugar , Chocolate Liquor , Cocoa Butter , Soy Lecithin , Vanilla , Vegetable Margarine , Palm Oil , Water , Soybean Oil , Salt , Natural Flavor , Soy Lecithin , Beta Carotene Color , Vitamin A Palmitate , Hollywood Premier Protein Blend , Soy Protein Isolate , Whey Protein Concentrate Milk , Wheat Protein Concentrate , Whey Powder Milk , Sugar , Crystalline Fructose , Maltitol Syrup , Polydextrose , Vegetable Glycerine , Egg Whites , Powdered Cellulose , Natural Flavors , Mono-and Diglycerides , Salt , Baking Soda , Cream of Tartar , Soy Lecithin , Sucralose a Sugarless Sweetener , Calcium Carbonate , Ascorbic Acid Vitamin C , Niacin Niacinamide , Vitamin B6 Pyridoxine Hydrochloride , Riboflavin , Thiamine Thiamine , Vitamin B12 Cyanocobalamin , Vitamin A Palmitate , Vitamin E Folic Acid , Vitamin D , Pantothenic Acid D-Calcium Pantothenate , Iron Naturally Occurring
    I would think the iron is naturally Occurring-makes me wonder if it will rust in humid climits. Keep up the work. Big Jake

  10. Anonymous

    I can actually hear you say the word sick.

    It just keeps bouncing around in my head. I’ve heard you say that word so many times I busted out laughing when you wrote it.

    You say it like a karate chop.

    Man I miss you.

    Uncle G

  11. Eean

    I’m offended. I love oatmeal raisin cookies. Don’t make me send an army of California raisin growers to vandalize your apartment with “I heard it through the grapevine that you wuz hatin’ on raisins….”

Leave a Reply

Looking for something?

Use the form below to search the site:

Still not finding what you're looking for? Drop a comment on a post or contact us so we can take care of it!